Hey there, fellow wanderers! After surviving what felt like an eternity in a flying metal tube (aka a trans-Pacific flight), I’ve got some fresh Vietnamese adventures to share!

Tam Coc: Where Snails Set the Pace

First stop: Tam Coc. Did we rest after that endless flight? Nope! Straight into a two-hour shuttle ride we went. But trust me, it was worth it.

Here, life moves at snail-pace, with Ninh Binh’s energy just a scooter ride away. Speaking of scooters – your best friend in Vietnam. Forget taxis (unless you enjoy donating money) or buses (unless punctuality isn’t your thing).

After a soul-reviving bowl of pho and an egg coffee that tasted like a caffeine-powered hug, we hit the backstreets. Picture endless emerald rice paddies and mountains that look like someone accidentally inflated green bread loaves.

Pro tip: Take a foot-paddled boat ride on the Ngo Dong River. These locals have mastered the art of paddling with their FEET. It’s like watching ballet, but with more conical hats.

Early birds? Conquer Lying Dragon Mountain’s 450 steps at 6 AM. You’ll have the sunrise views (almost) to yourself and avoid the midday heat that makes you question your life choices.

Hanoi: Where Honking is the National Anthem

Hanoi’s Old Quarter taught me that apparently, everyone’s a morning person except me. By 8:30 AM, the exercisers around Hoan Kiem Lake vanish, replaced by a swarm of scooters and the glorious symphony of honking.

The Hoa Lo War Museum offers a sobering but fascinating look at history from the Vietnamese perspective – definitely not a lighthearted stroll, but worth it if you want to learn something beyond scooter-dodging techniques.

To counterbalance the historical weight, we joined a local food tour with @curiousaboutvietnam. We sampled everything from crispy street snacks to noodle bowls that made me want to write poetry. My stomach was thrilled; my feet, not so much.

And then there’s Train Street – a surreal experience where trains zip past inches from your face. You need a “local invitation” (basically finding a shop owner willing to let you sit on their tiny plastic chairs). The potential train-related peril adds a certain thrill to your Instagram story. Hot tip: Want sleep? Request inner windows. The city’s a 24/7 party, and you’re not on the guest list.

Ha Long Bay: Floating Rocks and Snack Boats

Everyone says do a Ha Long Bay cruise. They’re right. We opted for the overnight experience because sometimes you just need to embrace doing absolutely nothing except floating and contemplating limestone karsts. Our boat staff were hospitality ninjas, appearing with snacks whenever needed (which was constantly). Our room had a tub and balcony – perfect for pretending you’re a ship captain surveying your watery domain. 

Prepare yourself for the snack boat armada – local villagers paddling up selling everything from chips to souvenirs. It’s like a floating convenience store with better views.

If weather permits, ditch the lounging for kayaking around those karsts. You might spot a monkey or two – probably plotting their own snack boat empire.

Da Nang: Baywatch at 5 AM

Da Nang: hot, sunny, and apparently Vietnam’s fitness capital at 5 AM. Locals sprint to the beach before sunrise for swimming and volleyball, while I contemplated breakfast in bed.

If you’re sand-averse, scooter up to Chua Linh Ung Temple, home to Vietnam’s largest statue. The ocean breeze is nature’s air conditioning when the sun’s trying to cook you.

Feeling energetic? Tackle Marble Mountain! Bring sturdy shoes and water – the climb will make you sweat buckets, but the view is Instagram gold.

When the sun sets, Da Nang transforms into a seafood paradise with restaurants that are basically live-action aquariums where you point at your future dinner. After eating your weight in shrimp, stroll along Dragon Bridge to see the weekend fire-breathing show – think heavy metal concert, but with more water.

Hoi An: Postcard-Perfect with Better Sandwiches

Our final stop was Hoi An, a UNESCO town that’s like stepping into a postcard with better street food. The architecture is a beautiful mix of Chinese, Japanese, and French influences.

At night, Hoi An becomes a wonderland of twinkling lights and food vendors competing for the “Best Banh Mi in the Universe” title. I achieved sandwich enlightenment here. Don’t miss the lantern-filled river – like fireflies decided to throw a party. It’s ridiculously pretty, and you’ll find yourself making wishes on paper boats.

And the tailors! Bring a photo of any outfit, and hours later you’ll have a custom version at Monopoly-money prices. It’s like having a personal stylist without the celebrity price tag.